Hello February,
Where did January go? I swear we were just bringing in the new year and making our resolutions. I am not normally one for resolutions because I don't think many people actually stick to them. That being said, as I looked back at 2013 and the person I was going into 2014 I knew I needed to make some changes. As many of you know, 2013 was by far the hardest year of my life and left me feeling empty and broken. My brother passed away unexpectedly, we had to re-home our dogs and we moved to a new country leaving behind family and friends. I found myself having nightmares, waking in the middle of the night and being unable to fall back asleep, I was not happy, I would cry over nothing and stress over everything... I had a major breakdown on New Years Eve and decided I was not going to spend the next year feeling the same way.
I know that I am grieving and I know I can not magically feel better but I need to manage my feelings and do items that will make me happy and stress less so that I can be a happier person and ultimately a better wife and mother. So here are the things I have tried and that seem to be working for me:
I started a family command center with a calendar and a daily chore list. This was essential for me because when I feel stressed I clean but then I stress over the items that are not clean and it ends in a vicious cycle of stress. The list gives me a day to do everything and I am able to overlook the fridge needing to be sorted because I know that every Wednesday I have that on the list. It may not work for everyone but it has released a large amount of stress because I am allowing myself to do something tomorrow or the next day instead of expecting it to all be finished today. I feel that my house is cleaner and I am less stressed. Plus the hubs knows what today's "tasks" are and is able to help instead of me feeling like I am telling him what chores to do, which I don't enjoy doing.
Next, I did some meal planning. I found a very simple blog with 14 crock pot recipes that can be frozen and cooked later. This helps because I feel accomplished knowing I have a surplus of meals and if I am having a hard day I can plan one of those and it take 3 minutes to cook dinner instead of 45.
The next thing I did was to find a hobby. Luckily, my husband has been very supportive and has seen how unhappy I was which makes it much easier to create time for myself to start a new hobby with a 1 year old at home. I have always wanted to ride horses well. I had taken a 10 week class before but with the amount of stables near our home, I knew this was the perfect place to really learn and enjoy. Emily is in nursery school 4 hours a week so I can go to this class, and she gets to socialize with new friends, win-win! I have also really been focused on making and selling my hair bows. This may seem unimportant to some but I enjoy it and take pride in making something that someone wants. I am going to a larger craft show in February and am excited to see how it turns out.
The final "resolution" is to exercise more. This has by far been the most challenging and hasn't been successful yet. Nick and I are signing up for a race in April which should help to motivate that goal.
I know that once I can start focusing on these goals, I can help control my emotions. I also know that being aware of my feelings is a great first step and having such supportive family and friends behind me will get me far. I am still having a difficult time but those moments seem to be farther apart and that is success. I hope all of you are still working hard towards your new goals and seeing positive results!
